Missing Jon

silly.jpgTonight Jon is on the East coast. I dropped him at SFO this morning, early early early this morning. And even though he'll be back late Wednesday night, I cried a bit. We prayed together for his safety and my productivity. And then he was gone. Boarding a plane that would take him 3,000 miles away from me.

silly2.jpgThat's tough stuff. I find it hard to do things when he isn't around and won't be around. Before we married I was a known "slob". Then... BAM!... we said "I do" and suddenly I liked to clean. Our house may not be spotless, but it's neat. Why? Because I know that our combined stress level goes way down when we aren't surrounded by mess. I clean because it makes my husband happy, our marriage easier. That kind of thing. But why clean today?

When Jon is home I do my best to eat well. It may sometimes take an act of God and/or effort from Jon to help me make a real meal, but that gets done when he's here. But why eat well today?

I've always liked being hygenically clean. Marriage, though, has taken that to the next level as well. Even as we've become more and more comfortable accepting each other at our very smelliest, I find myself kicking myself into action to shower, do my hair, use perfume, wear makeup... all for Jon. I want him to be extra proud of his darling, yummy-smelling, well-dressed wife. But why bother with that today?

So the day was hard. I tried to nap when I got home from the airport, but I was restless. Too much space in the bed, I guess. And then I found myself on the couch watching stuff in the backlog of our Tivo. Some things I'd already seen! How bored could I possibly have been? Apparently just knowing that Jon was not five minutes away at the office, that he wouldn't be home to have dinner with me and play games and be silly after work, was enough to stagnate any and all of my activities.

No worries. When his plane landed in Maryland in the afternoon, I was his first phone call. Just a quick "I love you" and "I miss you" before finding his rental car. That was all it took. I wanted to be able to tell Jon about my day, to make him smile and know that I'd be ready and waiting for him to come home on Wednesday.

Within moments of hanging up I was cleaning the kitchen, singing, making myself a turkey sandwich and milk for lunch! Laundry was done and folded, the shower was running and ready for me. When he called again once he was on the road to his hotel, I had been truly productive. I'd accomplished much, and by doing that I'd given myself the boost needed to accelerate me through work later in the day.

He told me about how he switched to a lousy seat on the plane because a nervous young lady beside him wanted to be next to her boyfriend. He was thinking of me. Diane Feinstein was on the plane, too, with bodyguard. How cool! Even though I didn't and wouldn't vote for her. He asked me how my day was going...

And I said, "I've done a lot, honey. You'd be proud." And he was.

Tonight I miss my husband a lot, but he will be home soon. I hope to get a lot done before then, too. School all day tomorrow. Visiting Cindy. Work on Wednesday. More cleaning. Preparation for our vacation this weekend. With the thought of my happy, proud husband ever in my mind, that shouldn't be too difficult.

Wish me luck!

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About this Entry

This page contains a single entry by Audrey Camp published on May 9, 2005 12:00 AM.

"Enter, Marmee!" was the previous entry in this blog.

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